Las Vegas has a lot to answer for. This most hedonistic of cities is a veritable lost property box of dignity, dollar bills and lost hours – and it’s also a lot of fun. Within its glittering, gaudily lit walls lies an unparalleled dedication to the pursuit of pleasure and excess – how else do you get a nickname like Sin City?! But just so you don’t get yourself in too much trouble, here’s our top do’s and don’ts…You’re welcome!
Stay on the Strip. You’d be surprised how different your experience of Vegas will be if you don’t manage to bag a room on the infamous Strip. Yes, it’ll save you some dollars to stay in that motel across town but you won’t get to experience the specifically Vegas-based pleasure of gambling your hard earned cash away without even stepping foot outside your hotel, while sashaying sequinned showgirls distract you from your losing streak.
Go to the top of the Stratosphere. In a land where you can stumble into ‘overrated’ as quickly as you can blow a grand (so…pretty quickly), you can’t really go wrong with a truly epic view. Head to the top of the Stratosphere, which is the tallest building in Las Vegas, and the fifth tallest in the US. There’s even a rollercoaster at the top for masochists.
Take enough money to enjoy yourself properly
You can do Vegas on a budget if absolutely necessary, but we’d recommend taking enough money that you don’t have to worry. Sin City is the entertainment capital of the world and there is just so much to spend your money on – meals, tickets, shows, casinos – that you’ll probably feel a little shortchanged by your own holiday if you don’t get to experience them all! Plus, we think you always appreciate something more if you’ve had to save up for it (that’s what we keep telling ourselves, anyway).
Head north past the Stratosphere and away from all the mega-resorts and check out the Fremont Street Experience for a little taste of “Old Vegas”. It’s a great way to soak up some of the ‘other side’ of Vegas besides the gleaming lights of the strip!
Because if you can’t in Vegas…when can you?!
Take your top off and strut down the strip with a load of blokey mates shouting “Vegas Baby!”
A strong look on no one. No one.
Go for the cheapest buffet
An all-you-can-eat meal for $12 may seem like a bargain, but just remember that you get what you pay for. If you’re hoping to avoid food that comes under the umbrella of ‘soggy, tasteless and dull’ don’t go for the cheapest – check out Planet Hollywood or The Rio instead.
Jaywalk (American speak for crossing the road when the pedestrian green light isn’t on) on Las Vegas Boulevard
The Yanks are pretty serious about their road crossing – it’s illegal to jaywalk in the USA. Whilst you might not necesarily get caught and arrested for it, you’ll definitely earn yourself some disapproving looks (or worse, get killed. By a car, not an angry person). Yes, we’re fully aware of the irony that Vegas – famed hotbed of every flavour of sin under the sun – would get their showgirl feathers in a flap about something so paltry as crossing the road, but them’s the breaks.
Use casino ATM’s
Unless you’re prepared to pay massive fees. Bring lots of cash with you and be sure to keep it locked in your hotel room safe until you need it.
Gamble if you don’t understand the game/are steaming drunk
Lets put it like this: all casino games are basically a losing proposition for casino guests. Casino games rarely set up favourable odds for players – how else do you explain a $40 million fountain at the Bellagio?! That doesn’t mean they’re not fun and that you shouldn’t play – but at least understand the game you’re playing to give yourself a fighting chance. Oh, and don’t play drunk – you’ll probably lose, and if you win, you’ll probably just bet it all on another game. And then lose.
…Unless you’ve gone to Vegas for that precise reason, in which case…Congratulations!